It's great to have you back dear,
Today I'm diving into a subject that is often perceived as selfish or luxurious, when in fact, the opposite is true. SELF CARE. You know, like, the caring of the self. Chances are you have a slightly ambiguous relationship with this tending to your own needs thing. And I get that. It's hard to do on most days and can seem downright impossible to maintain on bad days.
Why is that you might wonder? Is it because of a lack of time? Or of resources? Or perhaps not enough external support? The answer to that is; yes, yes and yes. These are absolutely valid reasons that can keep you from taking good care of yourself.
But there is usually a much more profound reason underneath the practical hurdles. The lack of self L-O-V-E.
Us humans have this insane capacity to not fully, unconditionally love ourselves. This can seem funny or cute when we're cool teenagers, but by the time we've reached adulthood and real life catches up with us with all its responsibilities, challenges and losses, we quickly come down from that cool kid cloud and crash.
Now here's why that happens. Your lack of self love creates this whole loop of other painful emotional states such as guilt, doubt, insecurity, self sabotage, disassociation, depression or even self hatred. I'm sure you've experienced this loop during your lifetime once or twice or perhaps are in the midst of it. I hear ya! And I've got you covered! Because here's the thing I want you to imprint into every cell of your beautiful gorgeous fabulous body and mind:
☯You are the only one who will live with yourself forever.
That's right. You and you alone get to breathe and live with yourself from your very first, magical, precious breath to your very last, peaceful breath. Take a moment to really let that notion sink in. I remember when I first really grasped this, it felt like a paradigm shift internally. I kid you not. Pretty big stuff huh? That's why it is VITAL that you practice loving yourself and care for yourself because no one else can nor should do that for you (that's not to say you won't get support along the way).
If your longest, deepest, most transformative relationship in life is with yourself, then might as well take darn good care of it and make sure you show up in life the best possible version of yourself. That's how you pass your light on. That's how you truly SERVE others. That's how you are able to give pure love and joy to those deserving of it.
I can't tell you enough how the practice of self care continues to enrich, strengthen and beautify my life and of those around me. I would not have come this far in dealing with my own struggles of living with an auto immune disease without being mindful about how I speak to myself or care for myself. It DOES matter. Self care is self love and self love is healing.
Some of you are going through a break-up or divorce right now. Or are mothers to small children (hello challenge!). Or are in the midst of treatment for a disease. Or have just lost your job, or are running a stressful business. Or are grieving the loss of a pet or a loved one or an unborn child. And the list goes on. Let me say for the record, I'm sorry you're going through such a struggle. And I wish you love and healing. Which is why I'm sharing my little self love manifesto in the hope it might serve you as an inspiration to be good to yourself, ESPECIALLY when life gets messy.
Self care manifesto
By taking good care of myself:
☯I give others permission to do the same
☯I vow to love myself unconditionally come what may
☯I become the best version of myself and give generously to those around me
☯I open my heart to the joy and beauty always surrounding me
☯I relax in the present moment and trust in life
Now you might be thinking, "well that's just lovy dovy Iva Joy, but I'm new to this yucky self care and I have no idea HOW to apply this in my life, help!"
I've got you covered sweetness, so here's my favourite self care routines that I practice daily. Relax, not all of them, are you crazy?! Just one is great already! Here it goes:
Self care habits
☯I walk my dog before bedtime and practice some Louise Hay affirmations out loud while walking.
☯I take long hikes in nature
☯I soak in a bath with salts or lavender milk
☯I massage my boyfriend and he massages me
☯I write in my journal
☯I read the ever inspiring Kris Carr
☯I eat organic food everyday mostly Paleo based. Hello veggies!
☯I practice yoga or meditate
☯I spend time in our garden, sometimes just staring at the green, sometimes tending to me veggies and flowers. Oh joy!
☯I sleep, sleep sleep.
☯I breathe deeply and tell myself I'm here no matter what
☯I disconnect from the world by switching off my phone
☯I speak my truth
☯I live my truth and stay focused
☯I practice self compassion when I fail or make a mistake. Therefore I am less hard on others too.
☯I cry and I laugh
☯I ♥. I love. I L-O-V-E
Love yourself and take good care of yourself. That way you'll have more to give of that precious you to those around you.
Let me know how you're getting along on your self care journey. I'm always happy to connect! You're also very welcome to join my 3 day course or one of my silent group walks in nature as part of your selfcare practice!
Love & Tranquility,